Recently I have been thinking a lot about why I feel stuck. Why do I always feel like my brain needs to be on, and why can't I just let my hobbies be hobbies?
Well, I am sure that there are plenty of reasons... but one in particular that stands out right now is that my day job is not what I want it to be, and because of this I feel a constant pressure to apply myself towards my goals.
However... I have built up a "wall of suck" around these goals. Because of this I direct a lot of energy that could be used during the day into a true passion into hobbies that I can dive into after work. My day job is so boring it is almost physically painful how little nothing I do some days (even if those days are made up for with very busy weeks between).
If I could just work towards my main goals (lab job in chemistry) during the day then I could relax at night... so why can't I just do that? Why do I feel the need to be forcefully doing nothing during my boring day job when I could just as easily work on things during all of that down time?
Again, there are several reasons this could be the case but none of them are good enough for me to give up. If that is the case, then the only option is to move forward. How, though?
Let us start easy. Here are the simple steps for me to at least try to start tearing down this "wall of suck":
- Look at your phone far less often. The phone does not go with you all over the place.
- Allow things to move slower. Not everything needs to be instant... it is okay if an animation takes 0.3 seconds instead of 0.01.
- Start narrowing down hobbies/habits that you truly want to focus on outside of your goals.
Three is enough to start with for now, I do not wish to get overwhelmed. It is a magic number, after all.